Yeah!

I'm coming at 2006 with a new attitude. Although my little lead in here has less to do with my resolution and more to do with what happens when you get stir crazy in a relative's house when you've already seen every episode of America's next top model . You get a bit hostile. Shit happens.

It's the first Monday in 2006. Mondays are so rainy in 2006. I miss 2005. This makes me think of that Carpenters song “Rainy Days and Monday”

Think how bummed Karen would be tonight, bless her heart.

So I haven't written in a while. I don't really have a good excuse other than being preoccupied with trying to figure out how to make your first record. I have run the gamut of emotions over the course of this process and SURPRISE! We're nowhere near finished. (Insert dramatic cry here) I feel like I'm learning myself all over again, and wondering if I ever really knew me in the first place. I think you will all be happy to know that the album will have a cool mixture of old songs, currently played songs and never before heard ones. In the process of song selection , I've really had to ask myself which songs are the most important to me, and to all of you. It's tough choice sometimes. Like choosing between children. And it's not like in my family where everyone just KNOWS that I'm the favorite. It's more complicated than that.

At the end of the day, I've really had to get quiet and listen to myself Really remember where I was at when songs were conceptualized and written, and let the ones that resonate most deeply come through. I'm choosing songs that really are important to me for a million different reasons and I have to just trust that those are the right songs. Oh yeah, and they have to be hits. Dammit.

As far as production goes, I'm as green as a 12 year old fat-Sara after too many cotton candies and a trip to the Gravitron at the County Fair. But I'm learning so much and soaking it up like a Brawny Paper towel.

I've been listening to music differently, I go on long walks with my Ipod and hear the mix of a familiar song in completely new ways. I'm learning to listen for instrumentation, the structure and flow of the production of a song, how different sounds from the same instrument evoke different emotions. I try to dissect why it is that certain songs always make me cry and certain others make me feel light as air, or sexy, or like I just want to drive up PCH forever. That's what I love about music, and I just want to do my best to capture the essence of my music so it has a chance to communicate with all of you. I know I sound new agey, but it's true, and it means the world to me, so deal with it.

Oh, and I forgot to tell you, I'm TOTALLY new age in 2006.

So I guess now that I look back I guess that's a pretty okay excuse for not writing. .. Ah, I feel better.

Seriously, I want to be sharing this road with all of you and I do resolve to write more. I am so ridiculously blessed to be in these shoes and receive so much encouragement and support from so many of you. So thank you for that. And thank you for your patience in waiting for new music, and the album. I hope it will be worth it. And thanks for always making me feel like I can try something new, and fall on my face and can trust that you'll wait till I leave before you laugh. I feel like I have this amazing network of friends, some that I've never met, who continually make me feel welcomed and understood, even if it's only for 45 minutes once a month at some dimly lit bar, or through an email, or just knowing you're out there listening. You make me feel like Jodi Foster in Contact, and I love you for that.

Happy Happy New Year. I sincerely hope that it brings you all the light and love you can handle.

I'm sending you mine.

-s-